These are a few lines of one of the conversations which I had with my wife when it was confirmed that my wife is expecting our first child.
Me(in a very excited tone) - Fingers crossed, I just wish our first baby is a baby girl, not that I will be unhappy if its a baby boy, but you know girls are special, the most special creation of the Almighty !!!
Wife(in an equally excited tone) - Yes, even I am hoping for one !!
Fast Forward to April 10th, 2011, 11:17 a.m. , me and my mum were sitting just outside the operation theater, both were tense, not speaking a word, just looking at the clock and anxiously looking several times towards the operation theater door. Shazia (my wife) was taken in the operation theater for a C-section, and as our wait nearly went into eternity the doctor came out smiling and announced " It's a baby girl" . I hugged my mom and both of us were in tears of joy ................. my dream was fulfilled, almighty had heard my prayers. Our life changed altogether with the arrival of this bundle of joy in our lives.
Life moved on, pretty fast though and we were soon expecting our second child, I was as good as or maybe more happier than the first time because I have been a single child and spent my childhood alone, I knew the pros and cons of it, and thus never wanted to father just one child. I always wanted our house to be crowded. Shazia had siblings, so she already knew how lively is the house with siblings around, it can't happen with just one kid playing all alone sitting in one corner, you need two to tango, and thus we mutually wanted to grow our family. Shazia too was happy, but her happiness wasn't of the same intensity as it was during the first time.This bothered me, initially I thought the pains of C-Section and hospitalization and stuff like how will Alishba (my first angel) cope with her mom's brief absence due to hospitalization etc. might be bothering her and was hoping that this temporary phase would pass by soon.............. but it didn't. One day my wife asked me " Do you want a son or a daughter?" and my response was "It doesn't matter, what matters to me is a healthy baby and your health during and post pregnancy".
That question from her made me ponder if I was actually going to start a journey to unmask the hypocrites that were around me for so many years? Maybe my worst fear was going to turn into reality. As the pregnancy progressed, comments like - "Its a son this time for sure, we can make it out from your face, and from the shape of your tummy" - I wonder if someone possessed such knowledge then more than half of India would start going to these people instead of hospitals and do the dreaded , and how can anyone make it out from the shape of the tummy? I mean is the baby inside always facing out or if it's a boy then is he horny right from the womb......... I hope you got the logic I am hinting to :D. Then the next one "Look at Raja (me) , he is looking a lot fatter this time as compared to when Shazia was carrying his first kid" ............ I mean come on, I was all alone in Bengaluru during my wife's first pregnancy, while during this one she was there with me for 8 months, its a simple fact that I was getting good homely food to eat this time, how on earth would a baby boy in my wife's womb make me healthier? Please someone explain me the logic behind this one, please !!!! All these things actually to me were funny.
And amongst all these funny experiences finally the day arrived when Inaayah entered our lives :) ! I was elated and the tears of happiness just filled my eyes, and as usual we had visitors wishing us for this new family member. But not all of these visitors were wearing genuine smiles on their faces........ for instance one of the visitors after wishing us was mentioning to my mother that why didn't we come to her during the pregnancy as she knew someone who could have identified if the baby is a boy or a girl, thankfully my mom said that we are happy and we don't need to meet such people ever.
So my point out here is that in this modern era too we are tied to the invisible handcuffs of orthodox thoughts. We have many hypocrites hiding behind the mask of supporting 'HER'. Unmask those or at-least ensure that their ill thinking do not really get any support from anyone else...... we need to VALUE HER and not just for the sake of showing, but for the sake of doing !
Me(in a very excited tone) - Fingers crossed, I just wish our first baby is a baby girl, not that I will be unhappy if its a baby boy, but you know girls are special, the most special creation of the Almighty !!!
Wife(in an equally excited tone) - Yes, even I am hoping for one !!
Fast Forward to April 10th, 2011, 11:17 a.m. , me and my mum were sitting just outside the operation theater, both were tense, not speaking a word, just looking at the clock and anxiously looking several times towards the operation theater door. Shazia (my wife) was taken in the operation theater for a C-section, and as our wait nearly went into eternity the doctor came out smiling and announced " It's a baby girl" . I hugged my mom and both of us were in tears of joy ................. my dream was fulfilled, almighty had heard my prayers. Our life changed altogether with the arrival of this bundle of joy in our lives.
Life moved on, pretty fast though and we were soon expecting our second child, I was as good as or maybe more happier than the first time because I have been a single child and spent my childhood alone, I knew the pros and cons of it, and thus never wanted to father just one child. I always wanted our house to be crowded. Shazia had siblings, so she already knew how lively is the house with siblings around, it can't happen with just one kid playing all alone sitting in one corner, you need two to tango, and thus we mutually wanted to grow our family. Shazia too was happy, but her happiness wasn't of the same intensity as it was during the first time.This bothered me, initially I thought the pains of C-Section and hospitalization and stuff like how will Alishba (my first angel) cope with her mom's brief absence due to hospitalization etc. might be bothering her and was hoping that this temporary phase would pass by soon.............. but it didn't. One day my wife asked me " Do you want a son or a daughter?" and my response was "It doesn't matter, what matters to me is a healthy baby and your health during and post pregnancy".
That question from her made me ponder if I was actually going to start a journey to unmask the hypocrites that were around me for so many years? Maybe my worst fear was going to turn into reality. As the pregnancy progressed, comments like - "Its a son this time for sure, we can make it out from your face, and from the shape of your tummy" - I wonder if someone possessed such knowledge then more than half of India would start going to these people instead of hospitals and do the dreaded , and how can anyone make it out from the shape of the tummy? I mean is the baby inside always facing out or if it's a boy then is he horny right from the womb......... I hope you got the logic I am hinting to :D. Then the next one "Look at Raja (me) , he is looking a lot fatter this time as compared to when Shazia was carrying his first kid" ............ I mean come on, I was all alone in Bengaluru during my wife's first pregnancy, while during this one she was there with me for 8 months, its a simple fact that I was getting good homely food to eat this time, how on earth would a baby boy in my wife's womb make me healthier? Please someone explain me the logic behind this one, please !!!! All these things actually to me were funny.
And amongst all these funny experiences finally the day arrived when Inaayah entered our lives :) ! I was elated and the tears of happiness just filled my eyes, and as usual we had visitors wishing us for this new family member. But not all of these visitors were wearing genuine smiles on their faces........ for instance one of the visitors after wishing us was mentioning to my mother that why didn't we come to her during the pregnancy as she knew someone who could have identified if the baby is a boy or a girl, thankfully my mom said that we are happy and we don't need to meet such people ever.
So my point out here is that in this modern era too we are tied to the invisible handcuffs of orthodox thoughts. We have many hypocrites hiding behind the mask of supporting 'HER'. Unmask those or at-least ensure that their ill thinking do not really get any support from anyone else...... we need to VALUE HER and not just for the sake of showing, but for the sake of doing !
